The Death Thingrelease from Double Life Press has been a wild and fun ride, for sure. I've done a number of readings and performances in support of Death Thing's release in Austin, TX. There will be many more.
I'm starting to look to the road, though. My good friend, Francois Pointeau, is hitting the road in an RV to do performances and sell his book and, hopefully, make a living. He's braver than I am. I can't live in an RV. I'd rather live across the street from a Whataburger. I may be joining him for some performances. He's heading west first. He's also starting a new podcast called The Rolling Chateau. It should be pretty damn good.
There have been a number of positive Death Thing reviews. Here's the list I have so far:
I read Flesh House for the first time ever live at the Whip In for Bastille Day. I'm told there will be a podcast posted of it. I could hear the crowd undulating in disgust. It was magnificent.
The release party for Death Thing at Radio Coffee and Beer went incredibly well. Holy War at the Sex Store was the opening band and they played classic standards like, "Stigmata Handjob." Francois Pointeau also acted as a fluffer with a short reading of his poetry. Chris Mattix was the host of the night. The Weekly Weird Monthly was represented by Cheryl Couture at the merch table. One lucky buyer got a can of tuna. It's possible they said, "Fuck tuna," but reports are unsubstantiated.
It was quite a night.
Sold some books, signed some books, drew some silly doodles that I regret. Such is life.
Francois is a local man-about-town. He's a bartender at one of my regular haunts, he's a radio show host, and a poet. I met him at Owen Egerton's One Page Salon at the Whip In almost a year ago now and we became fast friends. I was lucky to have him invite me on his radio show the first time in promotion of my chapbook Toilet Stories From Outer spaceand he invited me again to promote Death Thingyesterday.
The first time I was on the radio, I was nervous. This time it was a breeze. Francois is good at making things feel like a conversation (albeit without all the cussing).
Anyways, I'm pretty exhausted. I knew I wanted to promote the hell out of Death Thing as much as I could with live performances but I didn't expect to be so damn tired.
We're not stopping there, either. I'll be announcing more dates soon.
One big surprise of this past weekend was that my mom and grandma showed up in the humid hellhole of Austin right now to be at the release party. I was pretty nervous about the whole thing but they, as always, kept me near planet Earth. My grandmother is Donna Hilbert, a phenomenal poet who has always been an inspiration to me. She's encouraged me since the day I asked her how to write poetry when I was just a little snot-nosed twerp. She also printed the first edition of the first book I ever wrote, Fat Legs. At 29 I still have the same sense of humor as 5 year old me. That's something.
In other news... Ted Cruz does terrible Simpsons impressions
Ted Cruz astounds me. He managed to do every impression with the same voice.
Now, there are people on my Facebook feed that -I shit you not- refuse to watch the video because they don't want to give Ted Cruz any more legitimacy. I can assure you, watching this video will not add an ounce of credibility or legitimacy to the walking SCOBY that is Ted Cruz.
In fact, it just adds to a narrative of his own delusion.
I finally saw Mad Max...
Nina and I went to the first showing of Mad Max on a Friday. We were the only folks in the theater. I thought it was excellent. It was a lot of fun. It was just a damn good action flick with damn good action and damn good heroes.
Luckily, Tom Hardy had as many lines as I do fingers on half of my left hand. He only delivered half of those well. The other half sounded like bad impressions of Mel Gibson's Max. Small potatoes there. I didn't go there for lines.
And in the end, like every good western or samurai movie, the hero walks into the sunset for the next adventure.
Death Thing was released in May and the reviews are pretty damn excellent so far. I'm carrying around a stress ball for when the first truly negative review goes up.
I know it's bad for authors to even read their own reviews or to check their sales rankings so I try to limit it to fifty times a day.
The craziest thing that happened for the Death Thing release was that my publisher was sent fan art. That blew my mind. Take a look:
Besides that, I've been getting personal messages from readers expressing how much they liked Death Thingand that is honestly the best feeling for an author.
I've got a few more books coming down the pipeline. My relationship with Double Life Press is great. I couldn't have asked for a better publisher. If they'll keep publishing me, I'll keep sending them stuff.
The MEV is rolling hard these next few months. Here's the schedule:
First of all, Craig McNeely and Emily McNeely are fantastic editors and wonderful people. I couldn't have asked for a better relationship with my publisher. Double Life Press is a small independent press but I get the feeling Double Life will be on the lips of a lot of people. We did an Ask Me Anything style online release party on Facebook and it already feels like Double Life has built a great community.
Will Viharo is class manifest, Danny Gardner is sharp as a razor, Pablo D'Stair is an artist in all forms, and Jessica McHugh is the life of the party. That's not even mentioning the other upcoming Double Life authors. Salvadore Ritchie has a novel concept whose synopsis alone blows my mind. April Hawkes has a novel coming out that I can't wait to read. I can't even remember everybody's name because Craig has so much coming out.
Double Life is going to be huge, folks, and I'm as happy as a pig tastes in bacon form to be a part of it.
I'll soon be transcribing the questions and the answers from the online release party here but I wanted to say hello and do another sales pitch for y'all.
Death Thing is about a man who will not take it anymore. It's a pulpy, grindhouse, horror novella that is full of black comedy.
Dyer Wilk did a wonderful job on the cover. It looks like an 80s horror movie poster or VHS. He does phenomenal work. Maybe there will be a poster version of this because it certainly feels like it should be blown up and hung on a wall.
When we drove into our parking space, I got a real sense that something was up at my local 7-11. There was a lady in the passenger side of the car next to mine eating an ice cream sandwich and staring into the store, waiting for her driver who was presumably getting more ice cream sandwiches. Inside there were three cashiers behind the register, a young lady at the credit card swiper making hand motions as she talked to the uninterested cashiers, and we haven't even gotten out of our car yet.
I turned to Nina and said, "Somebody could do a sociological study on this one 7-11."
There were handwritten signs everywhere. "LEAVE YOUR BACKPACK AT FRONT DESK." "NO LOITERING, IT IS CRIME." It reminded me of the time I lived with a meth addict who went crazy cleaning our apartment and left notes reminding us to clean. "DO YOU WALK ON THIS FLOOR? YOU DO! CLEAN IT ONCE IN AWHILE!" These notes were everywhere. When I walked into the apartment and saw this, I felt like I was walking into some weird serial killer's game. Same way it felt going into that 7-11.
When I got out of the car, a large bearded man was also making exaggerated gestures to two cashiers that looked like they could have been cut from the same cheese curdle. I open the door. The bearded man exits. The store is quiet. Real quiet. There are three cashiers; two young ladies and a young man. Their arms were crossed. It felt like we interrupted them. I could feel their eyes on me as I walked toward the ice cream box.
When we got to the freezers there was a man, literally without any discernible shape with his skin melting out the sides of his shoes. He was covered in flea bites and he smelled the way a trash can smells after it rains and there's nothing but nacho cheese, dog shit, and standing water smell after you lift the lid off.
"I can't do this," I said. I turned around and headed for another part of the 7-11 and waited for the man to leave. He left with two Blue Bell pints and looked happier than I ever have at any point in my life. Good for him. He's gone.
You probably know that Blue Bell pints are criminally overpriced at 7-11, despite the buy one, get one free offer. You might as well go to HEB and get a gallon for the same price. It's much better to get a one off frozen-cream-on-a-stick deal at 7-11. I got the Butterfinger ice cream. Nina got the cookie ice cream sandwich. Solid choices.
When we went to the register, there were only two cashiers there. One was pulling at her lips via lip rings. The other was staring straight ahead in her Houston Rockets ball cap, nodding at whatever was intelligible coming from her compatriot's mouth as she tugged at her bottom lip. That's multitasking, folks.
"She said she was the only one to pass the test and I was like, damn, girl," the Houston Rockets cap girl said.
I have no idea what they were talking about but it went on for awhile.
Folks, I've been on a little bit of an internet-fast lately.
But Death Thing is coming.
Death Thing is coming soon.
The wonderful Double Life Press is publishing it. The one and only Dyer Wilk created the cover image. It looks great and I hope you'll enjoy it.
Meanwhile, I've finished the novel I was working on for awhile. It's called Invasion of the Weirdos and I'm currently doing some final edits. I think it's pretty darn good but I'm not sure it will have a home right out of the gate. It's a weird one.
I'm also writing the sequel to Death Thing called Party Bus: Death Thing 2.
I originally envisioned Party Bus as a standalone but I found a way to tie it to Death Thing and, boy, am I glad I did. It adds a lot of texture to the Death Thing universe but it can be read as a standalone (I think).
I have a whole bunch of ideas bouncing around and I wanted to tell you that I'm not resting on my laurels. I'm back at the writing desk (which is just my couch and a coffee table in near total darkness).
This guy just wagered $5 on a Jeopardy Daily Double because of course he did.
The one and only Dyer Wilk designed this, folks. I'm incredibly happy that Craig McNeely got him to design the cover. Death Thing will come out in April from Double Life Press.
