Starting the new year off on some kind of foot

Howdy, folks.

If you've spoken to me or seen any of my online conversations, you'll notice I've been using the excuse of, "I'm in the middle of a move," quite often. I love having a built in excuse for everything. It's like blaming the rain. But it's also a valid excuse for me. It's hard to pack everything you've accumulated over three years into a Honda Civic and into a storage unit.

It's not hard for me to shed things, though. I can take one look at something that used to mean something to me and say, "Fuck it," and throw it in the trash. I can't do that with books. I've donated some books, sure, but the majority of books I have stay with me. And books take up a lot of space. A boxful of books is also pretty damn heavy. When I put a box of books on my front passenger seat, the seatbelt warning goes off.

So it's taking a long time to get moved.

2015 was a good year. Death Thing was published, it was well-reviewed, and seemed to be selling well. I met a lot of good folks thanks to Death Thing including Danny Gardner and Will Viharo. Both these guys are top class writers. Look at the bottom of this blog post for some buy links. You really should read their work.

One thing that binds us is we all wrote for Double Life Press. Craig McNeely picked Death Thing up and commissioned a great looking cover by Dyer Wilk. I'm convinced the cover is half the reason a lot of people picked up the book in the first place. Alas, as with a lot of small presses, Double Life Press couldn't keep on in the midst of uncontrollable circumstances outside of the press. Any bystander could see the quality of work Double Life Press was putting out and think that DLP would be around forever. Hell, I thought they would be.

It should be made clear that I am incredibly grateful for the work Craig McNeely put in for me. Death Thing getting published was a career milestone for me and I am grateful for the experience. DLP closing means I have regained all the rights to Death Thing and am free to do what I want with it. At first, I thought I was going to try to get it republished by another small press but it's already been published and a lot of mileage it got early on is probably about as much mileage as it's going to get. It probably wouldn't be worth it to republish Death Thing unless something big happened (I'm working on getting something big to happen).

Instead, I've decided I'll probably have Weekly Weird Monthly reprint Death Thing to keep it in print and available for people to buy while hopefully retaining the reviews that were left on the original printing. I will try to get the sequels to Death Thing published at other small presses because there are a few more Death Thing tales to be told.

I read at Malvern Books in Austin, TX last night to promote Death Thing and Cat Food. The reading went very well. Before the event started, I was looking through the Facebook event page to see who all had RSVP'd. I saw the name MP Johnson and turned to Nina and said, "That's gotta be a mistake. He lives in Minnesota." It was no mistake. He pulled up and came to the show. He's escaping the winter in Minnesota in Austin; a wise decision. I first read MP Johnson's work at Out of the Gutter with a story called "Woods Porn." It was the weirdest fucking thing Out of the Gutter has ever published and I loved it. Unfortunately, I can't find the link to it either because I'm inept or I've slipped into a parallel universe where that story never existed.

MP with me and my unruly beard. I really hope he digs the books. 

It was also nice to see some old faithfuls come out to hear me read when they've heard the same bad joke ten times. They know who they are. 

2016 is going to be a big year. There's a lot planned for Weekly Weird Monthly. First up is Cheryl Couture's chapbook Beauty Pageant. After that, Sam Trevino's chap of poetry, Let Me Take Off My Wolf Mask and my own novella, Bangface. 

It's going to be a good year. Start it off right with some reading material:

Death Thing

Cat Food

Toilet Stories From Outer Space

Hard-Boiled Heart by Will Viharo

A Negro and an Ofay by Danny Gardner

Cattle Cult! Kill! Kill! by MP Johnson

Best of Austin 2015

Holy cow.

I was the critic's pick for Best Author Reading for the Austin Chronicle's Annual Best of Austin awards. 

Francois Pointeau and Owen Egerton also won some literary awards and my former employer, BookPeople, continues their reign as best bookstore in Austin. We got to party for free, got a nice tshirt, drank a lot of Austin Beerworks and ate a lot of Via 313. Sometimes life's just damn good.

I've been in Texas since 2010, though.

The Weekly Weird Monthly Automatons at the Austin Chronicle Party 

Nina, me, Cheryl, and Chris

Austin is losing Francois Pointeau to the road soon. We sent him off at the Whip In at his book release party. It was wildly successful. I had the honor of hosting the whole thing and all I can say is that Austin got a whole lot less French. Get Francois's book by clicking here. 

Francois as a boxed wino. The If Onlys on stage.

Death Thing is continuing to generate positive interest and I'm starting to pursue next steps career-wise. It's overwhelming but it's also necessary to keep forward movement. I think Death Thing is perfect for the screen and I'm talking to a lot of folks on how to get that done. 

I'll be in Long Beach on Sunday, October 4th, at Gatsby Books for a Death Thing release party but I'm also releasing my new chapbook, Cat Food, there. You can get both books here. 

MCDONALDSINSPACE is the code to get 13% off any order of two or more products at the Weekly Weird Monthly store

I'm extremely grateful to the city of Austin and Texas in general. I don't know that I'd be writing as much as I am today if it wasn't for a rather sudden move to Texas. Texas revitalized me. It threw me around and sent me to some depths in the beginning, sure, but it was for the best.

I'll be updating this blog more. I'm terrible at internetting. 

Death Thing reviews

Howdy, folks.

The Death Thing release from Double Life Press has been a wild and fun ride, for sure. I've done a number of readings and performances in support of Death Thing's release in Austin, TX. There will be many more.

I'm starting to look to the road, though. My good friend, Francois Pointeau, is hitting the road in an RV to do performances and sell his book and, hopefully, make a living. He's braver than I am. I can't live in an RV. I'd rather live across the street from a Whataburger. I may be joining him for some performances. He's heading west first. He's also starting a new podcast called The Rolling Chateau. It should be pretty damn good.

There have been a number of positive Death Thing reviews. Here's the list I have so far:

http://thenextbestbookblog.blogspot.com/2015/06/book-review-death-thing.html

http://www.sacredchickens.com/sacred-chickens-blog/and-now-for-a-break-from-the-usual-drivel

http://www.deadendfollies.com/2015/06/book-review-andrew-hilbert-death-thing.html

http://francoispointeau.com/death-thing/

It's been an exciting ride so far.

Tonight I'll be at Opal Divine's for Noir at the Bar. Here's a Q&A I did with BookPeople's MysteryPeople. 

I read Flesh House for the first time ever live at the Whip In for Bastille Day. I'm told there will be a podcast posted of it. I could hear the crowd undulating in disgust. It was magnificent.

If you've kept up with me in Austin you know that my favorite fucking band in the whole world is Austin's own THE IF ONLYS. When I was doing Slagdrop, they were the band we went to for every one of our parties. We collaborated on writing Margaret & the Infestation as a play (more news on that very soon.) We did Two Cowboys Settle a Dispute as a live play. They released their album. This whole fucking paragraph is a link to their album. Pay what you want but don't be an asshole. Throw down a ten-spot, dogg. 

The past couple days and the next few

The release party for Death Thing at Radio Coffee and Beer went incredibly well. Holy War at the Sex Store was the opening band and they played classic standards like, "Stigmata Handjob." Francois Pointeau also acted as a fluffer with a short reading of his poetry. Chris Mattix was the host of the night. The Weekly Weird Monthly was represented by Cheryl Couture at the merch table. One lucky buyer got a can of tuna. It's possible they said, "Fuck tuna," but reports are unsubstantiated.

It was quite a night.

Sold some books, signed some books, drew some silly doodles that I regret. Such is life.

Francois is a local man-about-town. He's a bartender at one of my regular haunts, he's a radio show host, and a poet. I met him at Owen Egerton's One Page Salon at the Whip In almost a year ago now and we became fast friends. I was lucky to have him invite me on his radio show the first time in promotion of my chapbook Toilet Stories From Outer space and he invited me again to promote Death Thing yesterday.

The first time I was on the radio, I was nervous. This time it was a breeze. Francois is good at making things feel like a conversation (albeit without all the cussing).

Anyways, I'm pretty exhausted. I knew I wanted to promote the hell out of Death Thing as much as I could with live performances but I didn't expect to be so damn tired.

The MEV rolls on, though. Next week I'll be performing at the Badlands for the Badlands Blotter. On the 14th, I'll be at the Whip In for Francois's Frenchie Bastille Day Festival and Hoedown. Then to round things out on the 22nd, I'll be at Bookpeople's Noir at the Bar with Brad Parks. 

We're not stopping there, either. I'll be announcing more dates soon.

One big surprise of this past weekend was that my mom and grandma showed up in the humid hellhole of Austin right now to be at the release party. I was pretty nervous about the whole thing but they, as always, kept me near planet Earth. My grandmother is Donna Hilbert, a phenomenal poet who has always been an inspiration to me. She's encouraged me since the day I asked her how to write poetry when I was just a little snot-nosed twerp. She also printed the first edition of the first book I ever wrote, Fat Legs. At 29 I still have the same sense of humor as 5 year old me. That's something.

In other news... Ted Cruz does terrible Simpsons impressions

Ted Cruz astounds me. He managed to do every impression with the same voice.

Now, there are people on my Facebook feed that -I shit you not- refuse to watch the video because they don't want to give Ted Cruz any more legitimacy. I can assure you, watching this video will not add an ounce of credibility or legitimacy to the walking SCOBY that is Ted Cruz.

In fact, it just adds to a narrative of his own delusion.

I finally saw Mad Max...

Nina and I went to the first showing of Mad Max on a Friday. We were the only folks in the theater. I thought it was excellent. It was a lot of fun. It was just a damn good action flick with damn good action and damn good heroes. 

Luckily, Tom Hardy had as many lines as I do fingers on half of my left hand. He only delivered half of those well. The other half sounded like bad impressions of Mel Gibson's Max. Small potatoes there. I didn't go there for lines. 

And in the end, like every good western or samurai movie, the hero walks into the sunset for the next adventure. 

ADIOS. 

BUY DEATH THING.

REVIEW DEATH THING. 

EAT DEATH THING. 

The MEV rolls on

It's been a wild month.

Death Thing was released in May and the reviews are pretty damn excellent so far. I'm carrying around a stress ball for when the first truly negative review goes up.

I know it's bad for authors to even read their own reviews or to check their sales rankings so I try to limit it to fifty times a day.

The craziest thing that happened for the Death Thing release was that my publisher was sent fan art. That blew my mind. Take a look:

Besides that, I've been getting personal messages from readers expressing how much they liked Death Thing and that is honestly the best feeling for an author. 

I've got a few more books coming down the pipeline. My relationship with Double Life Press is great. I couldn't have asked for a better publisher. If they'll keep publishing me, I'll keep sending them stuff. 

The MEV is rolling hard these next few months. Here's the schedule:

Sunday, June 28th, 7:00pm: Death Thing release party at Radio Coffee & Beer. Music will be provided by Luke Malone and Chris Mattix will be hosting. 

Wednesday, July 1st, 6:00pm: I'll be on Writing On The Air on KOOP radio in Austin. 91.7fm. If you're not in Austin, you can livestream it. 

Tuesday, July 14th, 7:00pm: Francois's Bastille Day Extravaganza at the Whip-In. A slew of writers will be reading. There'll be music and beer. I'll be reading something and slanging copies of Death Thing. 

Wednesday, July 22nd, 7:00pm: Noir at the Bar at Opal Divine's with Scott Montgomery and Brad Parks. 

Death Thing came out on Monday. Get your copy!

#deaththingface

Folks, Death Thing is out and I couldn't be any happier.

First of all, Craig McNeely and Emily McNeely are fantastic editors and wonderful people. I couldn't have asked for a better relationship with my publisher. Double Life Press is a small independent press but I get the feeling Double Life will be on the lips of a lot of people. We did an Ask Me Anything style online release party on Facebook and it already feels like Double Life has built a great community.

Will Viharo is class manifest, Danny Gardner is sharp as a razor, Pablo D'Stair is an artist in all forms, and Jessica McHugh is the life of the party. That's not even mentioning the other upcoming Double Life authors. Salvadore Ritchie has a novel concept whose synopsis alone blows my mind. April Hawkes has a novel coming out that I can't wait to read. I can't even remember everybody's name because Craig has so much coming out.

Double Life is going to be huge, folks, and I'm as happy as a pig tastes in bacon form to be a part of it.

I'll soon be transcribing the questions and the answers from the online release party here but I wanted to say hello and do another sales pitch for y'all.

Death Thing is about a man who will not take it anymore. It's a pulpy, grindhouse, horror novella that is full of black comedy.

Dyer Wilk did a wonderful job on the cover. It looks like an 80s horror movie poster or VHS. He does phenomenal work. Maybe there will be a poster version of this because it certainly feels like it should be blown up and hung on a wall.

I was very honored to get a blurb from Adam Cesare, writer of Tribesmen, on the cover: "Sometimes it feels like a book was written just for you. Demented, funny, and way more philosophical than you'd think a novella about a deadbeat booby-trapping his car would be, DEATH THING reads like part-Harold Pinter, part-Roger Corman."

Click here to buy a copy!

Death Thing cover art!

The one and only Dyer Wilk designed this, folks. I'm incredibly happy that Craig McNeely got him to design the cover. Death Thing will come out in April from Double Life Press. 

New year

Holy moly, it's been awhile.

That's okay because I've been sitting on news that can't be sat on any longer.

Double Life Press will be publishing my novella Death Thing in the spring.

After re-reading through it, I'm very proud of the work. It's a good grindhouse-y, pulpy, horror idea that I think is in damn good hands at Double Life and Craig McNeely. Dyer Wilk is designing the cover and if you're familiar with his work, you know that it should be a damn good one.

I'll be planning release parties in Austin and Los Angeles soon so if you know of any publications, blogs, radio shows, podcasts, etc that would like to cover, review, or interview me about the book - let me know!

I'll also be planning a sporadic book tour that will touch most corners of Texas and probably venture out to a few indie bookstores, cafes, and bars outside of Texas.

I'm excited.

To help fund this book-touring adventure, please consider purchasing my chapbook of short stories Toilet Stories From Outer Space here. 

In other news, Wienerschnitzel liked my doodle on Instagram without realizing it was about a sexual act with a hot dog.